Thursday, March 23, 2017

Praying for a relationship? Read this first:

God is not discussed in our society in a practical way that would allow us to have a meaningful relationship with Him.

He is often discussed in our society as being something undesirable or "oppressive."

But in reality, God and loving God is the only thing that fulfills our lives.

And false idols oppress people.

False idols make us completely miserable.

If you would rather die than live without it, it is a false idol.

A false idol is anything you think about or care about more than God (who is little discussed in the world in a way that you could care about Him).

God is Goodness and Adorableness Itself – the more we learn about Him, the more we find He is Good and Adorabbrible, and the more we can’t help but love Him, and want to love Him.

You need a God experience. A moment where you experience God. So you can see for yourself.

This can only happen if you actively seek God, instead of the false idol.

Then you will know and understand how God can fill up person’s soul and how someone could seek God in life. Then you will experience God's peace and satisfaction.

You will experience the peace of God, which is not a peace anything in the world can give you.

Many people refuse to stop seeking their false idol and so refuse to start seeking God.

This is called “rejecting God.”

It is spiritually very dangerous because it can make us extraordinarily, unimaginably unhappy in life and very very miserable when we die.

It leads us to be more and more miserable, to feel completely dead inside, even though our bodies are still alive.

False idols will always fail us, and people lose their minds when they have invested their lives into a false idol and it fails.

Our society supports rejecting God, but not only will this person be miserable in life, she will be spiritually lost when she physically dies.

At death, we go to enter into eternity and all of our false idols go away. They don’t exist anymore.

It is only us and God.

Suddenly, God is the only thing that matters.

We don’t want to meet God for the first time when we die.

We want to know Him already, very well, when we die.

We don’t want to have wasted our lives by having rejected God for a false idol.

Many people think they would rather die than not be in a relationship.

False idols are what make us completely miserable and make people even want to die.

The idolatry is what is making us miserable.

Not having a relationship is not what makes us miserable.

Idolatry about relationships, or idolatry about a particular relationship, is what makes us miserable.

Thinking only that relationship will make us happy.

Many people know little or nothing about God and so don’t think about Him or seek Him.

Many people are unhappy because everything in their life is more important than God. (Even people who think they are Christians but really, everything in their lives are idols.)

In reality, only God will make someone happy. That is why the relationship is a false idol – it is being treated like it is God (thinking it will bring deep fulfillment).

If you think about your relationship or a person more than you think about God, it is a false idol.

That means it is making you miserable, because you feel like dying or like life isn’t worth living without the relationship, like you “need” this relationship.

Idolatry is a spiritual condition, a spiritual disease, a sickness.

God cures this spiritual disease with His Love for us, when we seek to love Him back.

Idolatry is why you are unhappy.

Not necessarily what you think is making you unhappy, if you think you are unhappy because you are not in a relationship.

Not because of the relationship, but because of idolatry – making the relationship into God, instead of worshipping God as God.

For example, the woman who is desperate to get married, and maybe her family urges her to get married, too, and she gets involved with all kinds of bad relationships that are complicated.

She becomes very stressed and miserable, always worrying who likes her and feeling her heart torn in many different directions.

And she goes through one relationship, it ends, and she feels a gapping hole in her.

So she replaces that relationship with another relationship, and she is distracted for a while, but she is dissatisfied still, again and again.

And that relationship ends, too. And she just keeps replacing people because she thinks she has to be in a relationship.

Or she clings to the idea of a particular relationship that has ended, even though the relationship is over.

She's made a false idol out of being in a relationship.

She thinks she needs a relationship because she has made a false idol out of it, so she’s willing to go through all this grief, looking for a relationship that will fill her up.

But NONE of them will fill her up, even if it is superficially happy for a little while.

Because the real hole in her heart is for God.

"But I love God very much!" she says.

God is infinite. People taste a little of His love and it's dazzling, so they think they've had it all. But they've only had a drop.

So long as they keep worshipping people and relationships, they will keep dying of thirst for God.

God is the only satisfaction of your soul, NOT your boyfriend or your husband or your ex, and people will never complete you or fulfill you.

God is also driven out of a soul through mortal sin.

Mortal sin leaves a hole in the heart that only God can fill.

People think the hole in their hearts is because they do not have something – whatever it is they have made a false idol out of.

A woman has a hole in her heart because she isn’t in a relationship, she thinks.

So she gets in a relationship.

It doesn’t fill the hole in her heart because the hole is really from God not being there anymore.

She’s still dissatisfied on a deeper level, even if she distracts herself superficially with a relationship or the idea that everything is okay because she’s in a relationship.

The emptiness eventually leads her to dump him. Because she made the relationship a false idol, she blames all her emptiness on the relationship, even though the emptiness is because God is gone.

Or he dumps her because the relationship is spiritually dead, because the people involved in it are spiritually dead, meaning God isn’t in their souls.

And she still worships the idol of a relationship, so she is extremely anxious about not being in a relationship.

All her friends and sisters will make fun of her for being single, think of her as a “loser.” She was bad and used to make fun of people behind their backs for being single, or secretly look down on them or secretly gloat over them. So she is afraid, because of her sins she has committed against other people.

She has a false idol of what they think, so it makes her anxious.

She is not seeking God.

The anxiety makes her unhappy, the anxiety of her idolatry makes her unhappy, but because she has this idol, she thinks it is the anxiety of not being in a relationship, about others’ opinions.

So she seeks another relationship, or seeks after her ex who is gone.

She is even willing to sell her soul, so to speak, by committing sin to get her ex back.

She practices the occult and is willing to fornicate, but these will only make her spiritually dead inside by driving God away. They will make everything in her life a dissatisfaction because God is gone.

She prays to God for these idols, to have these idols of her relationships back.

She is trying to make Infinite God serve her idols.

When He – God – asks her to love Him, she doesn’t hear His call because she has mortal sins on her soul. These sins have blocked her from hearing God. She cannot hear Him.

She mistakes it for needing to serve her idols more and more, even though they make her miserable.

What she is really missing in her life is God.

She thinks about relationships and people more than about God.

She cares about her public image more than she cares about God.

Every relationship will ultimately crumble because of the spiritual death (God not being there) in and around her.

And each new relationship will leave her emptier and emptier – until she seeks God.

Even the good opinion of others will not fulfill her.

She will be miserable and empty until she seeks God.

God alone can make us happy.

God is Infinite Beauty, Beauty itself. Not superficial beauty. God is the beauty of the soul, most pleasing to the soul.

God is Light itself, not superficial, material light, not the light of the world, but the Light of the soul.

God is Joy Itself, not superficial distractions or an adrenaline rush or the tittilation of sin. But God is the ONLY joy of the soul.

God is Peace itself. Not the false, superficial material “peace” of getting high or a biological chemical effect in the brain after intercourse. God is the profound peace of the soul, and the ONLY peace of the soul. True peace, “a peace the world cannot give.”

God is the answer, the ONLY ANSWER, to everything that the human soul wants.

This is because God made us.

He created us.

He created us out of His Love, in order to love Him back.

Some people think they "need" a specific person for financial reasons or comfort or strength during trials.

We are never dependent upon one person. We must be dependent totally upon God, not a creature or creatures as God.

God will send us people who can help us in certain areas (like getting a job) for financial help – there is no one single person to help us.

We must pray and seek God and seek to reject our sins so God can be with us and bless us.

And other people will never satisfy us or give us strength and courage the way God will.

Often our fantasy of someone encouraging or comforting us is very different from the way things turn out in reality.

People don't really comfort us in real life like we fantasize they will.

They don't really make us feel good, like we ache for them to, like we long for them to.

What we are fantasizing about is God comforting us, but because we make a false idol out of a relationship, out of people, we replace God with the false idol when we fantasize.

And often our fantasies don't include how we will be self-sacrificing for someone else, although we will expect the other person to be for us.

People can help one another out in areas of finances and comfort, and it only has a limited good.

Other people can't free us from our idolatry for money and they can't put graces of courage and strength in our soul, transforming us, the way God can.

Most people don't want to, or if they do, are too impatient and have too much sin on their own souls, and so end up taking grace — even grace God gave us — away from us.

If people start depending solely on one another for these things, they will be disappointed, they will not be growing spiritually as people in God, and they will end up using one another for what that person can give them.

God wants us to depend on Him for all our needs.

He wants to free us and give us strength in trials, and give us a peace the world (including other people) cannot give us.

God wants to be our God, He doesn't want us to worship creatures.

The human soul only feels fulfilled when it completes what it was created for – loving God in return for the love He has for us.

What God wants to do in a soul that gives itself to Him is so great that no one can even imagine it: “But, as it is written: no eye has seen, no ear has heard, nor has it entered into the heart of humans, what things God has prepared for them that love Him.” 1 Corinthians 2:9

She was not created to serve a false idol.

She was created to love God, more and more and more every day.

If she doesn’t seek God more actively before she dies, she will possibly be in permanent serious spiritual trouble:

(Revelation, 21:6-8): “And [God] said to me: It is done. I am Alpha and Omega; the beginning and the end. To her that thirsteth, I will give of the fountain of the water of life, freely. She that shall overcome shall possess these things, and I will be her God; and she shall be my daughter. But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, they shall have their portion in the pool burning with fire and brimstone, which is the second death.”

“The fearful,” from the above quote from the Book of Revelation, means people afraid to admit they have a false idol or too afraid to give up a false idol.

Sometimes “the fearful” is translated as “cowards.”

We want to be brave, and face our mistakes so we can correct them and make our lives pleasing to God and good for us to live in.

If we don’t, we will get more and more miserable, and our lives will get worse and worse.

“The fearful” are people who realize they have done something bad with their lives, but instead of turning to God for help, they become self-conscious and turn away from God.

But God came to save sinners – people who have done something bad.

He pities us when we do something very bad because He knows how unhappy it makes us.

He knows it makes us unhappy to not have Him in our hearts.

More than we could want to save ourselves, God wants to save us – God wants to cleanse us and give us strength to not sin anymore, so He can be welcomed back into the heart of every person, no matter how bad that person was before turning to Him for help.

That is why we should ask God for help and not be so fearful that we end up hating Him.

Hating God will make us more miserable. He knows that, and He doesn’t want us to be miserable.

Fear takes away. Fear takes away from us until we are empty shells, and slaves to idols and sin.

Then we become miserable.

God gives. God gives to us. We increase when we are connected to God, when He dwells in us.

Then we become truly joyful.

The human soul can only be truly happy when it is pleasing God. And then we are incredibly happy, not just superficially, but in a deep, powerful way.

Mortal sin is a sin that permanently severs a soul from God until the sin is  removed in sacramental baptism (if someone has never been baptized; you can only be baptized once) or sacramental confession.

God is Thrice Holy – He cannot exist in a soul that has very bad sins in it.

So He is driven out when we sin very badly.

Our society says these things aren’t sins, but that is a lie. That is why certain sins make people very unhappy, even though society says they will make us happy.

Those sins will distract us for a time, but they will leave us empty, because they drive God away from us.

A mortal sin is different from lesser sins.

It is called "mortal" because it kills the soul, meaning the person is spiritually dead.

Spiritual death does not mean our souls stop existing when we die.

God made us immortal. We will live forever as ourselves.

Spiritual death means God is not in our souls, whether our bodies are alive or not.

This is called "death" because God is Life – Life of the soul.

On earth, a spiritually dead person has many false idols to distract him or herself with.

He or she may even say, "I don't believe in this so it is isn't going to effect me."

But even those who are cowards and so lie to themselves and say "it isn't real so it won't effect me," suffer from the effects of their mortal sins.

The cities with the highest suicide rate in the country are Miami and San Francisco.

They are "atheist" cities where anything goes.

The people aren't killing themselves because someone is "guilt tripping" them – no one would dare say, "you shouldn't do such-and-such" in one of those cities.

They themselves don't feel guilty for their sins.

Despite anyone's personal feelings or "personal belief," it is an objective reality that, when sin drives God out of a soul, and a person stops seeking a relationship with God, she is empty inside.

Even if she is so arrogant that she doesn't acknowledge or ever think of God at all, or even if she despises Him, or "denies" that sin exists.

These "atheists" spiritually die inside and are more and more miserable deep down, like all humans who commit mortal sin.

There was a counsellor on a college, who used to tell students who came to him: "do whatever makes you happy, whatever you want! Don't worry about 'right' or 'wrong'!"

He had so many of his students commit suicide that he eventually came to the conclusion that sin really exists, and converted, and now he spends his life trying to explain this truth to people on behalf of all the students he indirectly killed with his lies and misinformation.

Other people find themselves false teachers who say, "once saved, always saved – you can to anything and you will not spiritually die because Jesus died for our sins so we could do anything."

But Jesus said: "Not everyone that says to Me 'Lord, Lord' will enter the Kingdom of Heaven: but she who does the Will of My Father who is in Heaven, she shall enter into the Kingdom of Heaven." (Matthew 7:21)

These people may lie to themselves and take photos that they show to everyone where they are look happy, to lie to others, too, but that doesn't change how agonizingly dead inside they are without the God Who loves them and created them.

All people were created by God out of His Love.

When we physically die, all idols are gone, and so we can no longer distract ourselves from the spiritual state of our soul.

A person in mortal sin only have remaining that he or she doesn't have God anymore.

This is a burning in the soul, an intense agony, because that soul forever sees God completely revealed in all His splendor and beauty and mercy and love, the fulfillment of all human longing, but cannot ever join Him.

And the soul sees that it is because of its own actions that this agony has happened – because it rejected God and sought false idols instead during life.

A soul is capable of feeling more pain than a physical body. A body will eventually die if there is too much pain – the soul never dies, so it can feel much greater pains.

As beautiful as God is, and as fulfilling and wonderful as God is, is as terrible the pain a soul feels not being able to enter into God.

This pain is spiritual death.

Mortal sins include: not praying every day, not seeking God (idolatry), fornication (pre-martial sex – that is, a marriage recognized by the Church – or a legally married relationship that idolatrously worships sex, putting sex above God's law, including focusing excessively or obsessing on sex, building the relationship on sex, and/or doing certain sex acts that God condemns), pornography and willfully meditating on pornographic thoughts rather than using prayer to banish and oppose them (meditating on God can save your soul, so meditating on pornographic thoughts can destroy your soul), masturbation, getting drunk/high, (of all these things, it may be said: "you knew how to make a martyr of your heart to give pleasure to your flesh. Now make a martyr of your flesh to give eternal peace to your heart.")
blasphemy (defiling God and His Holy things and His people and Saints), murder and gossip/rumor spreading/excessive abuse/intense rage (which all have the purpose and/or result of destroying another person), harboring hatred in your heart for another person (no matter what s/he's done) or towards yourself (self-love isn't the opposite of self-hatred because both focus on the self – forgetting the self and loving of God is the opposite of both and the cure of both), meditating on destroying another person or meditating on doing violence to another person, actually doing violence to another person, compulsive lying or manipulating, (of all these things, it may be said: "God gave us sight and speech to accomplish holy deeds. A slanderer misuses them and degrade them, employing them for evil deeds.")
abortion, contraception (instead of natural family planning), the occult (casting spells, including love spells, going to a palm reader or witch doctor, playing with ouiji board, tarot cards, fortune telling, yoga, New Age, wicca, Santaria, spiritism, speaking with spirits like supposed TV “ghost hunters” or “clairvoyants” commonly do, summoning spirits, doing anything with chakras, etc.), bribes (accepting or offering bribes); if you have had your First Communion: to not go to confession at least once a year, to not go to Mass every weekend, to receive Communion in a state of mortal sin (if you are in mortal sin, you can go to Mass, simply don't come up for Communion – pray instead until you have gone to Confession), and despair of God's Infinite Mercy, to name a few very common ones.

On Divine Mercy: There is no sin that is too great for God to forgive: "I desire trust from My creatures. Encourage souls to place great trust in My fathomless mercy. Let the weak, sinful soul have no fear to approach Me, for even if it had more sins than there are grains of sand in the world, all would be drowned in the unmeasurable depths of My mercy. | "Let no soul fear to draw near to Me, even though its sins be as scarlet." | "No soul will be justified until it turns with confidence to My mercy; and this is why the first Sunday after Easter is to be the Feast of Mercy. [...] On this day the very depths of My tender mercy are open. I pour out a whole ocean of graces upon those souls who approach the fount of My Mercy [confession]. Whoever approached the Fount of Life on this day will be granted complete remission of sins and punishment.” | "Let the greatest sinners place their trust in My mercy. They have the right before others to trust in the abyss of My mercy. My daughter, write about My mercy towards tormented souls. Souls that make an appeal to My mercy delight Me. To such souls I grant even more graces than they ask. I cannot punish even the greatest sinner if he makes an appeal to My compassion, but on the contrary, I justify him in My unfathomable and inscrutable mercy. Write: before I come as a just Judge, I first open wide the door of My mercy. He who refuses to pass through the door of My mercy must pass through the door of My justice" | "I lived for you, I died for you, and I created the heavens for you. [...] Everything that exists is enclosed in the bowels of My mercy, more deeply than an infant in its mother’s womb. How painfully distrust of My goodness wounds Me! Sins of distrust wound Me most painfully. […] This distrust of My goodness hurts Me very much. If My death has not convinced you of My love, what will?" – from Devotion to Divine Mercy [ read more here ]

Part of the Divine Mercy devotion is also the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, of which Jesus promised: "Say unceasingly the chaplet that I have taught you. Whoever will recite it will receive great mercy at the hour of death. Priests will recommend it to sinners as their last hope of salvation. Even if there were a sinner most hardened, if he were to recite this chaplet only once, he would receive grace from My infinite mercy. I desire that the whole world know My infinite mercy. I desire to grant unimaginable graces to those souls who trust in My mercy."

Some clarifications on sins: (Sometimes people say they are practicing "Christian astrology" or "Christian yoga" or whatever occult practice and tact on the word "Christian" before it. They are refusing to humble themselves. Astrology from Persia is condemned in the Old Testament as occult. It was rampant in the Middle Ages when witchcraft was actually a social concern, although we are becoming more and more like that with even mainstream newspapers publishing "curses" to put on politicians. // And several Hindu leaders have warned foolish Westerners that they really are invoking gods [demons, as all false gods are] through yoga, which is one of the reasons people become obsessed with yoga so quickly. Obsession – of anything – is a spiritual step below demonic possession. Yoga has been warned against for centuries, even by secular psychologists. It is only now that people are so far from God and so idolatrous that it is part of the culture. There is no way to "invoke" God through yoga, and so there is no way there is such a thing as Christian yoga – that is a lie.)

(If someone is texting or looking at their phone while driving and commits property damage [destroying a car, for example], or injures a person, or kills a person, he or she has those sins. Someone who kills someone else from texting and driving has the sin of murder on her soul. Or destroying another's car, they have destruction of property – stealing that person's money, because it will cost money to repair the car. These sins don't go off the soul until the person stops texting while driving and goes to confession for committing murder, injury, or stealing. So, then – what is the sin of texting while driving, in and of itself? Idolatry, most likely, because it is putting social relationships above God – God gave you the duty to drive so that you don't kill or hurt others or yourself.
Likewise, if you are on the phone or online at work, or asleep at work, when it isn't a break, you are stealing company money because you are not doing what you're supposed to be doing. This is also a sin.
Finally, the rate of pedestrian deaths has increased to about 6,000 a year, from basically none a year several years ago, as a result of being so absorbed in social media or texting on the phone, which is, again, idolatry, and – negligent suicide? Reckless behavior resulting in death, which God also condemns.)

(Sometimes people can dress – or be un-dressed – in very, very provocative ways, and this can destroy that person's soul, as well. You know what I mean. You can be fashionable, you can look nice, but you can't try to be or look like a sex idol or porn star without driving God away from your life.)

(Implants, for example, breast or other body part implants, are also a mortal sin, as also seen from the high rate of suicide and depression after women get these. 15% of women who get breast implants successfully kill themselves. For every successful attempt, it is estimated that 8 more unsuccessfully attempt, and 20 more contemplate suicide, meaning women who get implants consider or commit suicide. The reason for this is idolatry – expecting something other than God to make her happy, this being, the way she looks – and the desecrations of the Temple of the Holy Spirit, which is, the human body. The flesh is being cut open, and a solid object inserted under the flesh, and then the skin sewn closed around the solid object. This must be, spiritually speaking, a desecration of the body, considering the spiritual problems that result from this procedure.)


Many people think that they are cursed who have committed mortal sin because nothing in their lives works right anymore.

But the answer is that God is not in their lives anymore – He was driven out by their sins.

In the New Testament of the Bible, Saint John teaches us that there is a difference between venial and mortal sin: “All iniquity is sin. And there is a sin unto death.” (1 John 5:17)

Loving God first will help us love one another better, because we are no longer loving each other for ourselves, but for God, and in the context of God, and with God's help.

This is why the more people ignore God and focus on themselves and worship creatures, the higher the divorce rate.

People don’t make good gods. It makes people miserable to be set up as a false idol, even if they think it will make them happy to be placed above God.

This is because everyone – every single person – was made by God to love God, as the first objective of his or her life.

If people don't have a right relationship with God — who is our most fundamental relationship — they can't have a right relationship with themselves or one another.

How we love God is reflected in how we love one another: "If any man say, 'I love God,' and hate his brother; he is a liar. For he that loves not his brother, whom he sees, how can he love God, whom he doesn't see? … No man has seen God at any time. If we love one another, God abides in us, and his charity is perfected in us.” (1 John 4:20,12)

If we ignore God, we are ignoring one another on a deep level. For example, ignoring the spiritual needs of others because we are ignoring the existence of the soul, because we ignore God.

This is how we sin against one another — ignoring God, or not putting Him first.

If someone really loved another person with full understanding, she would never fornicate with him because it would destroy his soul and their relationship, and cut them off from God.

Once cut off from God, they are cut off from virtues like loyalty and purity, and sins like adultery and abuse and dehumanizing one another (getting “bored” with one another) come into the relationship.

The relationship decays because sin and spiritual death are there. God – Life – is not there.

The people aren't capable of acting in a loving way anymore, because God Who is Love is no longer in them.

If they act loving, it is empty – an act. It is no longer life-giving because God is Life. And it is an act that often fails and the misery and hate – the absence of God – shows through.

This act is even observed in secular psychology. It is referred to as a "fantasy bond."

But it is really the result of idolatry and sin, and can only be cured through a real, meaningful relationship with God.

In a relationship between two people without God, there is no more appreciation for one another because they don’t appreciate God who does everything for them, because He is no longer in their hearts.

How can they deeply appreciate one another, people who are imperfect, if they don't appreciate God, Who is Perfectly Loving and Adorable? It is not possible.

She would seek God first, so she could understand how human lives and souls work, and seek to benefit both the life and the soul of herself and others, in the context of God, instead of in the context of false gods.

If both people in a relationship did that, then the relationship wouldn't crumble or be bad.

But if even one person seeks God, it can save many souls, and those souls would owe their salvation in part to the one who sought God on earth.

They would thank her and be her friend if they make it to Heaven, be her friend for all eternity because she prepared to meet God when they distracted themselves with deep misery, and so grace came through her to their souls, too.

Many people will not know the joy of a real relationship with God on earth. This is very sad, that they refuse this.

They spend their lives chasing meaningless idols at dissolve at death, and ignore everything that is important.

Don't be miserable like one of those people. They are very sad.


Some people think, "I will just ignore these mortal sins, brush them under the rug, pretend I didn't do them,"

but the sins don't go away off the person until she goes to sacramental confession with a real ordained priest.

The sin is still on her soul, preventing God from coming in fully and she is still suffering punishment for it in her life.

She may have been willing to spend the effort to go to a palm reader or fornicate, but not the phone call and few minutes to see a priest to save her soul.

God is so merciful that He even comforts sinners, so she may feel just a drop of His comfort and say, "I am done, God is with me."

But it's not true. This is a temptation. Satan wants us to remain in sin because he is jealous, because he gave up God forever, and he wants everyone to suffer. He wants to remain in control of her life, so it can still be miserable. He may even give her intense anger or fear of confession, and may convince her it is from her and not from himself.

God is still not with her as He needs to be and she will still be empty on a deeper level.

And God won't be able to comfort her and give her special graces and support her completely, until she completely turns towards Him.

She needs to have God wash the sin off her soul.

She has to reject the temptation to stop getting closer to God.

God will help us because He wants us to be united to Him fully. He longs for that day when He will be united to us.

The devil is a coward and will flee when we show determination and strength to do God's Will.

She needs to pray much and seek God much at home, for strength and courage and wisdom to do what is right, to read about God and confession and understand it, and make an examination of her conscious to give a good sacramental confession.

An example is, someone who fornicates, and then realizes it is a mortal sin, and says, "I will get married!"

But she never stops fornicating, or if she does, she never confesses the sin of fornication.

That sin is still there on her soul, and God is still not in the relationship.

This will cause problems in the relationship down the line – it may even cause it to crumble and fall apart.

80% of marriages end in divorce where the couple "lived together" for years before the marriage. And likely the 20% that don't end are so miserable that it is a greater punishment than if they did end.

There is no happiness outside of God.

Others, finding how easy and convenient sacramental confession is, think, "I will do whatever sin I want, and take advantage of God's mercy by just removing it later!"

God sees her insincerity and her sacramental confessions don't count until she sincerely wants God in her life and sincerely wants to stop being miserable, and sacramentally confesses her insincere confessions.

So false idols lead to intense, intense misery during physical life, and a misery and despair that cannot be fathomed, after physical death.

This is why the most important thing in our life is to seek God, while we are still physically alive, and to spiritually grow in His grace.

Graces in the soul are spiritual gifts in the soul.

Graces come from God, usually diffused into the soul through prayer, or holy reading, or others praying for us.

For example, if you read this and decide to change your life to seek God instead of idols, God has given you many many graces to pull you towards Himself, and you have responded to those graces positively.

This will make you happy in the long run, both in your life on earth and, if you continue seeking God sincerely, in eternity.

God's grace will make us fulfilled now and forever.

She will no longer be alone in her own soul, alone without God.

God will be in her heart, and the hole in her heart will be filled by God, Who alone can fill it.

She must seek God.

How can she seek God more?

What can she do?

The first thing she can do have great confidence in God’s Mercy. She can pray right now: “Lord God, have mercy on me, I have not done right because I have not sought You like I should, and it has made me miserable. I do not feel You in my soul like You want. Help me.”

Pray: “Lord God, I want to do right. I want to be happy. I want You to be happy with me.”

Pray: “Lord God, I want to love You. To love You is a grace in the human soul. All grace comes from You alone. Therefore, fill my soul with love for You – You alone can put love in me. I give my heart to You: put Your Love in it.”

Pray: “Lord God, I will start to feel love for You. Please don’t let me stop asking You to put more and more love for You in my soul.”

When will she have enough love of God in her soul?

She can ask for more love for God her whole life, and God will always increase this grace in the soul.

And then her happiness will increase and increase.

Many people and society will try to convince her to stop or give up "this God thing." They are tempting her.

She may also be tempted to keep going back to focusing on her idols and ignoring God, saying, "I will pray later" or "I've decided only my idol will make me happy" or, "I've experienced enough God, I'm done."

Jesus warns about this very much in the Gospels, so that we will recognize when we are tempted and decide to stay with God.

It's best not to talk about God experiences in the beginning because people will try to convince you to hate Him.

They are miserable because they hate Him and want others to be miserable, too – whether they publicly acknowledge that's why they're trying to destroy God in other people or whether they don't acknowledge it, or don't even realize it consciously.

However, you can't deny God if put on the spot.

"She who denies me before people, I will deny before My Father in Heaven," (Matthew 10:33) Jesus says.

This includes denying God by promoting mortal sin or pretending to still live in mortal sin.

Just don't go open yourself up to people attacking you by publicizing that you are now seeking God.

They will try to steal grace out of your soul, and when you are just starting out in seeking God sincerely, these can be very dangerous attacks.

Seek God quietly and give up sin.

Ignore temptations within yourself to postpone God or dismiss Him.

Ignore temptations from the world to hate God or give up on seeking Him.

Ignore temptations to return to false idols – remember how miserable you were while seeking the idols, and believe in the promise of God to save your life and your soul, and so seek Him.

Love always says, “more, more!” Love never says, “enough!”

Love God – "God, give me more love for You! More, more! I want to love You more and more – sincerely love You, not in word only but in my whole heart and with my whole life!"

A soul filled with love of God will always thirst for Him more and more, no matter what anyone else says, and no matter what temptation the devil (who is very jealous and miserable for having given up God for worthless idols) lays before it.

Keep turning to God and ignore all temptation to put Him off.

Saint Peter writes: “For if, flying from the pollutions of the world, through the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, they be again entangled in them and overcome: their latter state is become unto them worse than the former.

“For it had been better for them not to have known the way of justice, than after they have known it, to turn back from that holy commandment which was delivered to them.

“For, that of the true proverb has happened to them: The dog is returned to his vomit: and, The sow that was washed, to her wallowing in the mire.”

People who have dogs know that when the dog throws up, it walks away from it's vomit for a time, then walks back to eat it.

The proverbs is a metaphor for going back to something that is not useful for us.

Peter is telling us that we need to seek God and not look back to our old paths, our old ways of doing things or thinking about things.

We need to give up the way the world sees things, because it will lead to our misery.

Peter goes on to write that the ways of the world are “promising us liberty, whereas they themselves are the slaves of corruption. For by whom a man is overcome, of the same also he is the slave.” (2 Peter 2:19)

This slavery makes us unspeakably miserable inside. Those people are miserable. They gloat over others and act superior, and they are dead inside.

God will help us not go back to the ways of the world.

Romans 8:34: “Jesus… is at the right hand of God, who intercedes (prays and appeals to God) for us.” He is constantly praying for us and offering His Wounds for our sins, that we might turn away from them towards Him.

He alone will judge us, not the world, not those who gloat, not those who we are in a relationship with or want to be in a relationship with.

Only God will either save us or judge us at the end of our lives: we have to do what He asks, or else we will be unhappy.

We have to keep seeking God, and asking Him for wisdom.

This is very good!

But she is still anxious about her relationships because she still has these idol attachments in her soul.

She will keep praying to love God forever, every day, many times a day.

But she is still anxious about all these things.

She has not spiritually grown enough in her relationship with God or dealt with her mortal sin.

What else can she do??

Literally every single entry on this blog is about what you can do to seek God, and about God’s Infinite Mercy in forgiving our sins, and how we can obtain information about Him and learn to love Him more and more.

Most of the entries quote the Bible and Saints, who are real people, once physically alive like you and me. They are very wise and spent their lives loving God and meditating on Him and the Bible. We know the Saints are in Heaven because prayers to them have had God work miracles and led people to growing closer to God and understanding Him better. (They are not the spirits "summoned" by occultists.) Very rigorous and objective tests and trials are done to determine if someone is a Saint in Heaven after he or she has physically died.

Their writings are very helpful because we can see the struggles they went through and how they became closer to God.

Because we know their lives brought them to Heaven, we don't have to worry about their writings leading us to error.

We have to pray to God so He can enlighten us so we can understand their writings.

Otherwise, our sins or idols or spiritual immaturity can blind us, and we can read it wrong.

We need to pray always.

We can pray the same prayers the Saints prayed to God and overcome the world, the way they did.

Then we can become true children of God and be very fulfilled.

If we know more about Him, we can think more about Him, understand Him better, and learn to speak to Him and pray to Him.

Then, we can love Him more and more, and become happier and more fulfilled.

How can she find time to read these entries, and – many of these entries lead to books written by saints. How can she find time to read all of these things?? It is so many things!

God said, we must rest on Sunday, His Holy Day. And we must be kind to people on these days, too – we must not say mean things or fight or argue. And – we must pray to Him on these days, too.

He says, when we do these things, we will please Him and He will start to bless us by giving us more graces in our souls.

When we are resting on Sundays, we will have much time to read about Him and learn things about Him and think about Him.

And then we will have new information to think about all during the week.

And so she will do this.

And she will learn many wonderful and powerful prayers that will draw her closer to God and God closer to her.

She will learn the Rosary, too, which is a powerful prayer.

And then God’s grace will really flood her soul and transform her from who she was, into a new creature of God's grace.

And she will be led by God towards Himself and towards all that He loves, and He will be able to shower her with all the graces He wishes to lavish upon her.

And then, she will be happy and not idolatrous and empty, like the other people in the world who constantly seek after empty idols.

Her heart will no longer stop and her breathing will no longer stop, as if she were dying, when she thinks about not being in a relationship.

She will no longer feel like a "loser" and she will no longer look down on others but instead be the one to pity those around her because they are so enmeshed in their idolatry, and they think it gives them something but she will understand in her soul, in a profound way, that it makes their lives much, much emptier.

And she will understand that they will have to stand before God, too, at the end of their lives. And their boyfriends and husbands and social status will not stand with them – only how much they sought God and loved Him still and their sins will stand with them.

And she will understand that her exes will also have to stand before God. And only how much they sought God and loved Him and their sins will stand with them.

And she will end up being the one who plays a big role in saving their souls because her prayers will become holy and no longer idolatrous or superstitious. And God will start to hear her prayers because she no longer has mortal sin in her soul. So she will be able to pray that people do not lose their souls, and many souls (that she either knows or does not know) will be able to avoid Hell when they die because of her prayers. And she will be their great hero for all eternity in Heaven.

Many people don't have the grace to understand any of these words or concepts because they are still seeking to serve their false idols instead of seeking to serve God.

That is why it is better to just pray for people. They need grace to accept God and rise out of their current situation, and grace comes from prayer.

Prayer is love. Jesus tells us to love our enemies by praying for them. By saying this, He is saying that prayer is love.

He wants us to love our families and friends, too.

Prayer is love because it brings people closer to God, Who is Love. It brings down grace for their souls, so they can give up the misery of false idols and sin and seek God, and avoid being lost forever.

When she does this, she will no longer be competing with people, or idolatrously striving after them, but hoping that God saves them.

God will be very pleased with her, and she will be happy.

So she will no longer be sad, and seeking after empty things, but she will become full of grace, and seeking after God and praying to God.

She will have fulfillment, because she will have God, and God is the complete fulfillment of the soul, and the only One Who can fulfill any human heart.

In this way, she and God will have spiritually conquered all her idols and her enemies and all her sorrows, and replaced them all with the true meaning of life, which is to seek the God that created her out of His Infinite Love, and for the purpose of His Infinite Love.

She will be fulfilled and joyful.

Sometimes, it keeps us locked in the past to continue thinking about people of the past.

Sometimes, thinking about people of the past is like "a dog returning to her vomit." And sometimes, it can make us spiritually sick.

We may still want to pray for these people, but without thinking of them specifically because it is bad for us.

We can pray for everyone we have ever known by waking up in the morning and praying: "Eternal Father, I offer my day to You, united to the life of Your Son on earth, for all those I know and who know me."

God knows who those people are. When we pray this way, we are putting it all in His Hands and He is using our relationship with Him to mystically save souls. It's all happening spiritually, beneath the surface.

We have to "have confidence in God's mercy. More than we could want to save souls, God wants to save souls.

We have to trust that He will hear our prayers and is working to save souls, even when we don’t see it.

Think – many years you spent away from God, and all of a sudden, you decided to turn away from idolatry towards God wholeheartedly.

There was no indication you would for years and years, but there were many many people – people you don’t even know – praying for you all that time.

Amazing how we are all connected when we are in God, isn’t it?

And how we are all disjointed from one another when outside of God.

We have to turn wholeheartedly towards Him.

It is important to always ask and pray, "God, where do I have an idol, or a sin?" so that we can confess it to God and ask Him to replace it with His Love.

Sometimes people think they have no sin, not even a little one, and that they have no idol. So they don't ask God to get rid of it.

This keeps us from getting closer to God.

God is Love. We must always want more, more Love, closer, closer to Love Himself!

We must always, our whole lives, even if we are no longer committing or living in mortal sin, ask God to show us our small sins, and take them away.

We must always be brave our whole life, and always face ourselves, so we can have God richly in our lives, so we can be fulfilled and happy and not miserable and empty.

This will indirectly help many other souls, as well.

And we will be happy and peaceful in our lives and for all eternity, for being very close to God.

Spiritual Healing After Abortion – Stories from Project Rachel (

Website is Hope After Abortion, known as Project Rachel: spiritual support for those suffering from the aftermath of an abortion.
Here are some stories, taken from [this page], including:
A woman who was pregnant at 13,
a rape victim and subsequent alcoholic,
a woman who felt inhuman,
a 40 year old who had had an abortion in her 20s.
I was thirteen the first time I was pregnant. I was scared and didn’t know what to do. HopeAfterAbortion saved my life. I don’t know what I would have done without it.
In June of 1987, I saw the last thing I ever expected to see — a positive result on a home pregnancy test. I had just turned 18 years old.
I had been raped four weeks before by an acquaintance at my prom. I hadn’t told anyone what had happened to me, and I told no one that I was pregnant. I simply dealt with it on my own. I stood up, went to the phone book, opened it up, and called the first abortion clinic I could find. I didn’t stop to think, to pray, to question. I didn’t consider any other option — I didn’t think I had another choice.
I went to the clinic a couple of weeks later for an abortion. I remember the feeling of complete isolation and utter terror as I sat in that waiting room. I was surrounded by other people, but completely alone.
I promptly put away all of my feelings and thoughts about what had happened to me — the rape, the abortion, the baby. I graduated from college, worked through my twenties, got married, got pregnant with my first child. My pregnancy was joyful but also tinged with fear. I didn’t deserve to have a baby. I had killed my baby — God would take this baby away from me as a punishment.
I went on to have three children. I rocked them to sleep, kissed away boo-boos, pushed them on the swings and caught them on the slide, took them to swimming lessons, soccer, and school. Along the way, I always felt like someone was missing. I thought that loss I felt was that first child. I didn’t realize that loss I felt was God. There was a hole in my soul that could only be filled with God, and I felt separated from Him.
During my thirties, as I was outwardly being a wife and mother, I was also descending further and further into depression, anxiety, and ultimately active alcoholism.
I struggled with alcoholism for almost a decade, looking for help from medical treatment and fellowship with other alcoholics. Nothing was touching it — nothing was helping me put down the bottle and take control of my life. I sought mental health treatment for the trauma I experienced around the rape and the abortion, but I was still suffering, and I was still drinking. It constantly weighed on my mind that I was in a state of mortal sin — I had killed my baby. I needed to go to confession, and so I finally did. Even though my priest granted me absolution, somehow I didn’t feel forgiven. I continued to drink.
I had heard about Project Rachel somewhere, I don’t remember where exactly. Should I call them? I had already been to confession for my sin, how can this be something different? I just hoped and somehow felt that it was.
I finally summoned the courage to contact Project Rachel. I got a call back from a beautiful woman, who simply and lovingly talked to me as if I were worthy of her time, and her help. What a gift!
I attended a one-day retreat in May of 2009. I was a mess, sick with fear and anger. I even took a few drinks that day to get myself to the retreat. Sitting in a room with other women who were in as much pain as I was, hearing their stories, sharing my own out loud, was an indescribable relief. I didn’t know I could say, out loud, that I had had an abortion and have those words be met with acceptance and understanding.
I thought I was sitting in a room with other women. I really was sitting in a room with God, loving me and welcoming me home. His presence was manifest in the physical presence of the others in the room. It was a full circle from the day in 1987 when I sat in an abortion clinic, completely alone.
I didn’t know it then, but that day at the Project Rachel retreat was the beginning of my journey back from the depths of alcoholism. Slowly, with work on my part, and help from others who suffer from the same spiritual malady, I found myself on the path to sobriety and in a relationship with God. I have found peace and forgiveness and mental wellness.
I know that my child is with God. I know that my living children and my husband and I are also with God. We are all together today, in God’s hands. I hold that child and my children in my heart every day, and I am grateful for Project Rachel for bringing me to this place of peace.
I want you to know I went to Confession tonight. I was terrified. Needlessly.
The priest who heard my confession was not disgusted by me, or angry with me. He never stopped smiling at me even as I revealed my ugliest sins. He was gentle, kind, and loving. Of course, this made me cry. Hard.
He was patient.
He absolved me of my sins. Told me I was worthy of all God’s kingdom.
So not what I expected.
This website planted a seed of hope in my heart that I could really be forgiven. God took it from there.
Thank you so much for being there in a way that didn’t make me feel dirty or contemptible. For making me feel human again.
I am a single 40-something woman who chose to have an abortion at the age of 27. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. … I went through it alone, never telling anyone at all. It was many years later, after I had got more active in my Catholic faith, that I began having some memories or little flashbacks about the abortion. 
I really didn’t think I would ever forgive myself and I just knew God would not either. 
I was full of guilt, shame, and all the things that are mentioned here on this site [HopeAfterAbortion]. 
I had a lot of anger at myself, the man involved, and many others as well. 
I had finally had enough when every time I was at Mass and the word abortion came up in any way, my heart just ached worse each time. 
I saw Project Rachel listed in our church bulletin many times, but just couldn’t call them for some reason. I guess it was that I thought they would judge me in some way if I did. 
Something made me schedule an appointment with our seminarian at church, and we met, but for what seemed like forever, no words were spoken, at least by me. 
Then somehow and without any eye contact at all, and many tears, I finally told someone my story. 
I was very nervous and anxious and constantly worrying about what he must be thinking about me the whole time. 
His words could not have been any nicer or more supportive. 
It was this man who gave me the information for Project Rachel, and when I finally made that phone call, I talked to the woman on the other end for over an hour, telling her things that I hadn’t thought of in several years. There were many tears as well. 
She gave me names of priests involved in the program. 
… To shorten this story, I met with the priest, and later another newer priest at my own parish (who was also just ordained the year before) and once again after at least 10 minutes of silence, I poured out my heart again, tears flowing freely, and still felt totally supported by these people. 
I went to a weekend retreat in Virginia, and the people I met, from both those of us on the retreat and the leaders, could not have been more wonderful. 
The priest at my own parish, had it not been for scheduling of events, would have been there himself to support me. All of this will never be forgotten by me as long as I am alive. 
I still struggle with things, but have received much support from my church. 
Please know that you are not alone, even though at the time you don’t really feel that way at all.
Hope AfterAbortion


On Divine Mercy: There is no sin that is too great for God to forgive: "I desire trust from My creatures. Encourage souls to place great trust in My fathomless mercy. Let the weak, sinful soul have no fear to approach Me, for even if it had more sins than there are grains of sand in the world, all would be drowned in the unmeasurable depths of My mercy." 

"Let no soul fear to draw near to Me, even though its sins be as scarlet."

"No soul will be justified until it turns with confidence to My mercy; and this is why the first Sunday after Easter is to be the Feast of Mercy. [...] On this day the very depths of My tender mercy are open. I pour out a whole ocean of graces upon those souls who approach the fount of My Mercy [confession]. Whoever approached the Fount of Life on this day will be granted complete remission of sins and punishment.”

"Let the greatest sinners place their trust in My mercy. They have the right before others to trust in the abyss of My mercy. My daughter, write about My mercy towards tormented souls. Souls that make an appeal to My mercy delight Me. To such souls I grant even more graces than they ask. I cannot punish even the greatest sinner if he makes an appeal to My compassion, but on the contrary, I justify him in My unfathomable and inscrutable mercy. Write: before I come as a just Judge, I first open wide the door of My mercy. He who refuses to pass through the door of My mercy must pass through the door of My justice."

"I lived for you, I died for you, and I created the heavens for you. [...] Everything that exists is enclosed in the bowels of My mercy, more deeply than an infant in its mother’s womb. How painfully distrust of My goodness wounds Me! Sins of distrust wound Me most painfully. […] This distrust of My goodness hurts Me very much. If My death has not convinced you of My love, what will?" – from Devotion to Divine Mercy [ read more here ]

Part of the Divine Mercy devotion is also the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, of which Jesus promised: "Say unceasingly the chaplet that I have taught you. Whoever will recite it will receive great mercy at the hour of death. Priests will recommend it to sinners as their last hope of salvation. Even if there were a sinner most hardened, if he were to recite this chaplet only once, he would receive grace from My infinite mercy. I desire that the whole world know My infinite mercy. I desire to grant unimaginable graces to those souls who trust in My mercy."